• You buy Salsa by the gallon.
• Your Christmas decorations include a half a yard of sand and 100 paper bags.
• You think a red light is merely a suggestion.
• All of your out-of-state friends start to visit after October but clear out come the end of April.
• You think someone driving wearing oven mitts is clever.
• Most of the restaurants in town have the first name "El"or "Los".
• You think 6 tons of crushed rock makes a beautiful yard.
• You've signed so many petitions to recall governors that you can't remember the name of the
incumbent.
• You notice your car overheating before you drive it.
• Your house is made of stucco and has a red clay tile roof.
• You can say "Hohokam" and people don't think you're laughing funny or choking.
• You no longer associate bridges (or rivers) with water.
• You see more irrigation water on the street than there is in the Rillito.
• You know a swamp cooler is not a happy hour drink.
• You can say 115 degrees without fainting.
• Every other vehicle is a 4 x 4 - AND IT'S WHITE!
• You can be in the snow, then drive for an hour and it will be over 100 degrees.
• Vehicles with open windows have the right-of-way in the summer.
• People break out coats when temperature drops below 70 degrees.
• You discover, in July, it only takes two fingers to drive your car.
• The pool can be warmer than you are.
• You can make sun tea instantly.
• You run your air conditioner in the middle of winter so you can use your fireplace.
• Most homes have more firearms than people.
• Kids will ask, "What's a mosquito?"
• People who have black cars or black upholstery in their car are automatically assumed to be from
out-of-state or nuts.
• You notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
• The AC is on your list of best friends.
• Monday Night Football starts at 7:00 instead of 6:00.
• You realize that Valley Fever isn't a disco dance.
• You can finish a Big Gulp in 10 minutes and go back for seconds.
• The water from the cold water tap is the same temperature as the hot one.
• You can (correctly) pronounce the words: "Saguaro", "Ocotillo","Tempe", "Gila Bend", "San Xavier",
"Canyon de Chelly", "MogollonRim", "Cholla", and "Ajo."
• It's noon in July, kids are on summer vacation, and not one person is walking on the streets.
• You experience third degree burns if you touch any metal part of your car.
• You know better than to get into a car with leather seats if you're wearing shorts.
• Announcements for Fourth of July events never end with "in case of rain......"
• When someone asks how far you live from a location, it's always in terms of minutes, not miles.
• Everyone's smiling and talking about the great weather on rainy days.
• You have to explain to out-of-staters why there is no Day Light Savings time.